Incredibly Vague New Years Resolutions

1. Don’t be afraid of THOSE PEOPLE.
2. Drink less drinks that contain THIS.
3. Iron THESE more.
4. Don’t yell THIS word out loud so much.
5. Eat more things that have THIS vitamin in it.
6. Do THIS less with people you fancy.
7. Be THIS with people.
8. Don’t do THIS to yourself.
9. Don’t say THESE KINDS OF THINGS to people ’cause they’ll believe you.
10. Initiate more of THESE.
11. Don’t be a THIS-eater.
12. Do THIS to more books on the fall of the Roman Empire.
13. Don’t roll THESE so much.
14. Do more THIS exercise.
15. Do THIS more on the train.
16. Stop doing THIS every time you say something genuine.
17. Stop worrying about whether or not you turn into THEM.
18. Stop throwing THESE away
19. Do THIS to your hair more. Yeah!
20. Do THIS when you see something you really like.

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