ANOUSH talks to TOMATO ASPIC

ANOUSH. I’m sorry, I don’t think red is the right color.

TOMATO ASPIC. Get out!

ANOUSH. Wait a minute — Haven’t I seen you — ?

TOMATO ASPIC. Or shall I get my server!

ANOUSH. You’re Tomato Aspic. You were around in the 60s. You used to be big.

TOMATO ASPIC. I am big. It’s the dinners that got small.

ANOUSH. I knew there was something wrong with them.

ANOUSH. Don’t get sore at me. I’m not an executive. I’m just making conversation.

TOMATO ASPIC. You are! Talking words, words! You’ve made a rope of words and strangled this business!

ANOUSH. Ssh! You’re… jiggling.

TOMATO ASPIC. Get out!

ANOUSH. Next time I’ll bring my autograph album along, or maybe a large spoon.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

TOMATO ASPIC. You’re a talker, you said.

ANOUSH. Why?

TOMATO ASPIC. I want to chat with you about something. Come in here.

ANOUSH. Ooook.

TOMATO ASPIC. How long is a dinner these days? I mean, how many courses?

ANOUSH. Depends on what it is – a quick bite or a sit-down.

TOMATO ASPIC. This is to be a very important dinner. I planned it myself. Took me years.

ANOUSH. And you’ll play the main course?

TOMATO ASPIC. What else?

ANOUSH. Only asking. I didn’t know you were planning a comeback.

TOMATO ASPIC. I hate that word. It is a RETURN. A return to the millions of people who have never forgiven me for desserting them.

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